I was just advised today by my generous and loving fiancee that when wearing my wedding band, it will be wholly inappropriate to clutch at my fingers and fall down screaming “Oh God, it burns, it burns, cut it off, cut if off.” — particularly at the reception.
In fact, she advised me that this is quick flight to Deadsville, Population me.
Now how I’m supposed to have any fun at this wedding is beyond me. Maybe I can find a way to incorporate squirt guns and ox blood into the ceremony.
