March 2007

Between my co-worker and I:

Him: “It’s funny how you can try to work with a vendor for hours and not get anywhere, and Alan can just send one short email and they just do what we want them to.”

Me: “Not that surprising, though — my spending authority begins and ends with the vending machine.”

So I’m standing in line at the local store to grab a couple of tickets for the recent OMG XOBX HEUG LOL Mega Millions drawing.  Right as I get up to the counter, some dude behind me who looks like a reject from a George Michael lookalike contest says to his friend “Man, I can’t believe people waste their money on this shit.”

I was feeling merciful, since I can see where he’s coming from.  To me, the lottery is a fun, momentary escape from the daily doldrums.  It’s fun to dream for a moment or three.  Do I expect anything?  Of course not.  Harmless fun, and I have a hard limit of $2.

But as I’m fishing my keys out of my coat, I see him drop a $10 on the counter and say “Gimme a pack of Parliament Lights.”

Had I only known…